Life is full of “defining moments”. Some of those moments are good moments and they change our life for the better. Some of the “defining moments” are not so great and our life takes a dramatic left turn and everything we knew has now changed.
I had one of these “defining moments” last week. I was on vacation in Grand Cayman. I had been in Grand Cayman for a week already with a dear friend. Steve was flying down on Saturday and my girlfriend Chris was going home on the same day. No big thing, Chris dropped me off at the house Steve and I were renting on her way to the airport. Steve was flying in that afternoon and he was going to rent a car, pick a few groceries and drive out to the house about 45 minutes away from the airport in the Rum Point area of the island. I spoke with Steve at 7am that morning and he was just finishing getting ready to leave the house for his 10am flight.
I spent the day doing what I normally do in Grand Cayman, sitting in the sun and reading. I had a pretty much perfect day. I was able to get online and see that Steve’s flight was going to be about 45 minutes late. No big thing he should be at the house around 6pm. I was missing my honey and really looking forward to seeing him. 6pm came and went. 7pm comes and I am starting to get mad. I was thinking that things can run very slow on the island but what was he doing that was taking so long? At 8pm without a word from Steve I went from mad as a hornet to scared to death. WHERE WAS HE? As far as I knew he had been on the island for 4 hours, what could be taking so long? I called his cell phone and I got no answer. I turned on my cell phone and I had no message from Steve.
I am not one to panic. But I was really starting to lose it. This just did not make any sense to me. Why had I not heard from Steve? I knew that he had the phone number to the house. My mind was just running like crazy thinking. Was this going to be one of the “defining moments” in my life? Was my life about to take a dramatic left turn and be forever changed? Was my love affair with Grand Cayman going to be over for good? “Where the hell was he?” I know my husband and I knew he was not sitting in a bar drinking a beer watching sports on TV. I could not come up with any explanation about where he could be other than in trouble. I was powerless. I was 45 minutes away from the airport without a car and I knew that if something bad had happened to Steve there was no way anyone would know where I was or how to contact me.
I am not a big fan of not having control of what is going on or not having a plan. All I could think of doing was calling 911. I had already called the rental car place and they were closed. The operator was so nice she gave me the hospital numbers, the Georgetown police station number and then the immigration phone number. She suggested that I call immigration and see if they could give me any information. Thank God there was someone still at the immigration office as it was after 9pm by then. The man on the phone was so nice and looked up Steve in the computer and he said that he has just landed at 8pm on an American Airlines flight from Miami. What happened to his comfy direct flight on Delta from Detroit? I did not care at that point. At least I had a partial explanation as to where he was and I figured that he OK at that point and he would have a good story to tell me about his day flying.
I was finally able to breath and my panic was subsiding. I started to think that maybe my life would go on as it was before. Maybe I had not had one of those “defining moments” that would change everything in my world. I was on an emotional roller coaster. First I was mad as a hornet, then scared to death and then in the middle trying to calm down and just breathe. About a half an hour later Steve finally arrived at the house by taxi.
Poor Steve had spent 13 hours at the mercy of the “traveling demons” and he had pretty much been in his own nightmare the whole day. The story goes that he got to the airport in Detroit 2 hours before his flight and it was a total mess at the airport. The lines to check luggage both inside and out were longer than he had ever seen and nothing was moving. After 45 minutes standing outside in the cold (in shorts no less) he finally got up to the kiosk and it said he needed to go inside to see an agent. Wonderful, another long line to wait in as the clock kept ticking on his flight time. Between the changeover to using the Delta Airlines computer system (antiquated at best, I hear from the staff) and the Atlanta airport being closed the day before because of snow the airport was insane at 8am. Steve even had a first class ticket and that line was not moving. (Note to anyone flying Delta out of Detroit in the next couple of months 2 hours before the flight may not be enough time due to this antiquated computer system with lots of bugs that no one knows how to use yet!)
Finally when Steve got to the ticket counter it was almost time for his scheduled flight. The gate agent was super nice to him and after getting on the phone with Delta in Atlanta to get help her she booked him on a Delta flight to Miami and then on the American flight to Grand Cayman. Well at least he was going to get to Grand Cayman today he thought. Steve tried several times to call the house phone and the calls would not go through. As he was waiting at the gate for the Miami flight he also texted my cell phone to let me know what was up. As far as he knew I got the text and I knew what was up with him. As you know that was not the case. Once Steve was at the house and we figured out that the real “kick in the pants” for poor Steve was as he was waiting at the gate to get on his flight to Miami his original flight had been delayed and he really had plenty of time to get on that flight. Somehow the gate agent had not actually checked on the status of his original direct flight to see that it was delayed. He really didn’t have to go to Miami and then Grand Cayman after all. He never really missed the plane. He was about to throw-up when we figured that out!
Everybody has a travel nightmare story. If you travel and fly you have these stories. This story is really about traveling and the hassle it can be. Both Steve and I travel a lot and we know the drill. We kind of look at it as your number has to come up sometime. We just hope when it’s our turn to live the travel nightmare that we are not in a situation when we “must” be there for something important. I remember several years ago one of my relatives was flying all the way from Greece to come to our cousin’s funeral and he was delayed several times and missed the funeral. Getting to your vacation late it not big thing compared to missing a funeral you came half way around the world for.
You see as this story was unfolding and I kept thinking about this being a “defining moment” in my life and that night I was so relieved that it was not going to be one of those times when life takes a dramatic turn for the worse. What I have since figured out is this actually was a “defining moment” in my life. Waiting for my husband for hours and not having any idea what happened to him did leave a lasting impression on me. It was a lasting impression for the better. I am once again reminded of what matters most. As much as he drives me crazy at times (everybody’s spouse does that from time to time). I do know for sure that I love Steve with all my heart. I am so blessed to have him in my life. How good things really do come to those who wait. I waited 37 years for him to come in my life. He was worth the wait!
I think that Steve and I both learned from this situation how fortunate we both are to be together. Steve kept saying at least he was not trying to get anywhere he “had” to be at. How glad he was not the couple he met with 2 little kids that had been trying to get to Jamaica for 2 days that were stuck in Detroit from NY. I am committed to remember this story with good memories of how happy I was to see him and see that he was just fine. How important he is to me and how lucky I am to have him. How imperative it is to “re-frame” situations and look for the positive in everything that happens in life. I guess that we are all having “defining moments” in all that we experience and do on a daily basis. It is those moments that define who we are a people and what is important to us. Until next time, be well.
Steve and I out to dinner the night after he flew in and us on the beach for the last sunset of our trip
Man oh man have I been busy the past few weeks. Needless to say Christmas and New Years seems like it was years ago right now. I’m OK with that. I like that it is February now and we gotten January past us and we are one month closer to Spring. I am a huge fan of the warmer weather and sunshine. Bring it on!
Steve and I had a wonderful trip to Orlando over the New Years holiday. Regardless of the cold weather, we had a really great trip. The fireworks at the Magic Kingdom were really spectacular. We also had a great fireworks show at our hotel in New Years Eve. (The JW Marriot in Orlando, I would recommend it). I just love fireworks. I guess I have since I was a kid.
Just after we returned from Orlando I flew down to Nashville for 5 days for our big Professional Photographers Annual convention. It was a really great show. I saw so many lectures that I enjoyed and learned a bunch. I am still (I hope I always will be) a student. I just love to learn. I like to put new ideas and concepts in my head. Just because I do a lot of teaching doesn’t mean I know all I need to know. The convention is a great way to start off the year. Of course, I also got to see my many photography friends from all over the world. I am so blessed to have met so many great people in my profession that a now like family to me. My professional photography extended family is a real blessing.
The reason that I have mentioned my educational and creative seminars is because my time away really helped me plan a huge project I have started. As you know I just love to photograph babies. The younger and smaller they are the better. I am in awe of the newness and innocence of newborns. I am also very aware of how fast that newborn stage of life goes. It is a window that is only open for a few weeks. I get all choked up trying to describe my infatuation with newborns. I love to look at them and wonder who they are going to be in their lives. Where is the journey of life going to take them? Do they know that they can do anything they want, be anything they want to be? Like I said, I just adore little babies!
I started thinking at the end of last year that I wanted to give myself a creative assignment for 2010. I wanted my assignment to involve photographing newborns. My goal was to photograph one newborn baby a week for year. As I was thinking about my creative assignment I thought about what a great collection of portraits I would have at the end of the year. I should get the images published in a book, I thought. I have also wanted to get a little more active in helping others this year. I know that I have been blessed with many gifts and I want to use my gifts to help others.
As I continued to process and plan my self assignment I realized that I could publish my collection of newborn portraits and help others all in one. I thought about giving away all the profits from the book sales. As I began to think about a charity to help I knew two things. It had to be a charity that helped children and I wanted the money we raise to stay in Michigan. It didn’t take long for me to select my charity. A couple of years ago I met and worked with an amazing woman who is making a real difference in the lives of sick children and their families. Lisa Zimmer and her co-founder Mike Hopkins started their foundation Just for Kids in 2001 with one single purpose. “Replace the pain with a smile, if only for a while.” 100% of the funds they raise go directly to the kids and there is zero administrative cost for this charity. The selfless work that they do is an inspiration to all.
Out of all of this thinking “Angela’s Baby Project” has been born. It has been a whirlwind of activity at the studio the past few weeks. We have started our project, printed marketing materials, designed and published a website (www.angelasbabyproject.com) and photographed 5 newborn babies! I am so jazzed about how fast my little project has taken off. It has quickly become even better than I had dreamed it would be.
Over the coming months (did I mention it is a year long project) you will be hearing much more about “Angela’s Baby Project” because we need your help. We need babies to model for us. We don’t know that many pregnant women. However, we all do together. You may be expecting, or you have a friend or relative that is expecting. Someone you know knows a woman that is pregnant. See how this works, we need you to talk, email, text, tweet and whatever else you can do to help us get the word out.
On the website (www.angelasbabyproject.com) there is a place for models to sign up. The website has lots of information about our project and it is very easy to sign up. If you have any questions simply just call Rosa or me at the studio, 249-349-3916. We would love to chat with you and tell you all about “Angela’s Baby Project”. It is a very exciting and fun project and the more people involved the better it will be.
I hope that you can tell how excited and inspired by my new project. It has already taken off so fast. It is going to be a great year and all help we are getting our project running is really amazing. I am so jazzed and charged for the coming year. I hope you can feel it and catch a bit of it for you life. Until next time, be well.
From Our Home to Yours
Steve and I just wanted to take a moment to wish each and every one of you a blessed Christmas. We hope that you are able to spend this holiday with the important people in your life. Take the time to celebrate all that is good in your life. We will be spending the day today with my family and tomorrow with Steve's family. We are so blessed to have our families living close to us. We have just a little more baking and cooking to do. It's time for Steve and I to open our gifts to each other. Until next time, be well.
I wrote this over a week ago and did not post it. I have been having a real problem with posting on my blog. Something really weird has happened in the past month. I realized that people are reading this. I should be happy about that right? Isn’t that I am writing this? Now I feel the pressure to do a good job. To write something that has meaning. Pressure = Writers block. I have a serious case of writers block.
I totally hesitate to do this but I would not be honest if I did not mention that I got a nasty comment sent to me a few weeks ago. It was from some random photographer that reads my blog. I did not approve the negative comment for all to view (I get to do that it’s my blog, ha ha!). Of course, the person did not have the guts to leave their name or real email address. I have to ask this question if you do not like me and think I am a horrible person, why would you read what I write? The fighter in me has several nasty comebacks to your spineless nameless comment. The grown up in me says “sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
So to my blog fans (all 3 or 4 of you) I am going to do my best to keep at this blog thing and get over my current writers block issue. I need to push through and stay true to my vision and not wimp out. So here goes for one and all the blog post I wrote a week ago and that I have been sitting. I hope you enjoy and understand the true spirit it was written in. Plain and simple, it is just me being honest.
This past summer I had a wonderful college girl working with me assisting me on my sessions. I have pretty much known Kelsey her whole life. Her Mothers family grew up just down the street from us in Northville. I photographed her when she was just 2 years old. I also photographed her senior portraits a couple of years ago. I had run into Kelsey in the beginning of the summer and had a blast reconnecting with her. I am sure this has happened to you that you knew someone as a child and then when you get to know them as an adult it a different game. It’s really fun when you liked them as a kid and you like them just as much as an adult. When I needed some help at the studio I gave Kelsey a call.
This past weekend for Kelsey was in town for Thanksgiving and she stopped by the studio to say hi. After we caught up and visited she told me that she wrote a paper in one of her classes about me. Really, are you kidding? The paper was not written from a business perspective. She wrote it about me, my passion for what I do.
I can’t stop thinking about how amazed and honored I am that Kelsey wrote about me. Here is the really cool part, after just spending just a few weeks working with me she summed me up in the one word. PASSION. How great is that?
I guess I never really thought about it much. I do have passion. I am full of it (OK you all know that I am totally full something else too, but lets not go there right now!) As I am writing this I am realizing how lucky I am to have passion in my life. How many people go throughout this amazing journey called life with little or no passion? I honestly don’t k now where I get it from. How come I have it and so many do not? I wish I could answer that. I really wish that I could give a little dose of passion to everyone.
I feel that I have passion for so many things. I have a passion for my family and friends. I really do have passion for photographing. I fell passionate about my work. I put passion in to just about everything I do. If I am going to do something I am going to give it all I have and tackle it with passion. I am so blessed to have been given this gift.
I said a moment ago that I wished that I could give a “little dose” of passion to everyone. You know I just realized that I am giving that little dose of passion to all of my clients. It is because of the passion I have for people, learning their story and capturing it in photographs that I create the images I do. I guess that Kelsey was right about me.
I feel that life is a gift that has been given to us by God. We have to fulfill our part of the deal and live our lives to the fullest. To live our lives with all we have, with passion.
It is my wish for you that are living your life to the fullest and with passion. To have the ability to dig a little deeper when you need it to find your passion and push on through. My wish for you is to have passion in all you do. Until next time, be well.
I just wanted to let you know that you are in for a very fun night at our first “Girls Night Out” at the studio tomorrow. I have had this idea for years and I am so excited that we have finally made it happen. We have some really great products that our vendors are going to be showing. We are expecting a pretty big turnout. That is music to my ears. The more the merrier. It is really going to be a fun night for all.
I started out the day yesterday making 2 batches of biscotti cookies. Then last night Carlin and I got to work and we made chocolate chip cookies and frosted sour cream cookies. This morning I am going to make pumpkin bars. Needless to say we are going to have plenty to eat! Nothing scares me more than the thought of not having enough food at a party. You can be sure that we are going to have more than enough of everything. It’s just what I do!
I sure do hope that you can join us tomorrow night from 6-10 at the studio. For more information click here, https://app.e2ma.net/app/view:CampaignPublic/id:11867.2567550603/rid:2ed0e1329453655f94daa16db2103157 I promise that you will have fun. Please feel free to bring a friend or two with you. Stop by for an hour or plan on staying all night. Don’t forget that I am going to be taking free Facebook photographs for everyone. Hope to see you Friday the 13th at our first “Girls Night Out”. Until next time (I’ll post photos from our event soon), be well.
Some people are just nice. They just are. Unfortunately some people are just not so nice. Every one has a bad day and I don’t claim that I am the “happy and nice” person I want to be all the time. I have my moments and my buttons get pushed too. I really do try to stay aware of what I am putting out there in the world. I don’t want to focus on the not so nice people much. I really don’t like negative energy. Let’s just stay in our happy place and talk about nice people.
It’s fun to be around nice and happy people. Being around a happy person can actually help you become a happier and nicer person. It’s like spreading a virus, the happy virus. The only thing we can control in life is how we react. No one makes us upset, we let ourselves become upset. We let what happens around us affect us. I am not saying that we all don’t deserve to have our own “pity party” when things are not going well for us. We just can’t let the negative thoughts or energy win for too long. It just brings you down and sucks you dry.
I just spent some time searching the web about what makes us happy. (What did we ever do without Google?) I found lots of articles on it and even a Harvard study that has been ongoing for over 50 years. Guess what? Money does not make you happy. Where you live does not make you happy. Relationships, they make you happy. Creativity, curiosity, bravery, and kindness can make you happy. Of all the articles I read the biggest common thread is that you have to “act as if” or my favorite have a “fake it until you make it” type of philosophy.
It kind of made me happy just reading it. I am not sure why seem to be so obsessed this year about “staying in my Happy-Place.” If you have been reading my past blog posts it does really come up often. Let’s be honest here. I have really had a crazy year full of life changing events. My Mom had a massive stroke and now lives in a nursing home. My husband closed his software company. I had to have major surgery. I could go on about the negative stuff that has happened to us this year. I guess that must be where my obsession to be happy is coming from. Stuff happens to us all. Some of it is worse than other things. I am not saying that I have not had my meltdowns or horrible and not so nice moments. I just WON’T let myself get STUCK there. I try as fast as I can to get back to my “happy place”. I try to look at what is good in my life and focus on that. I try to spend my time doing what makes me happy.
A few days ago at the studio we had a really sweet, nice couple and their children in the studio for a family portrait. They were so kind and positive to be around. (She even told me how she loves my blog. How nice is that?) For the most part we get to have really nice people in the studio. We are so lucky to deal with happy people just about all the time. However, on this day we just had a really not so nice person in the studio earlier that morning. You know, one of those people that is pissed off at the whole world, all the time. No matter how hard you try to make them happy it does not work. Of course, we all come across people like that at times. Have you ever noticed that it is really hard to get that un-happy person out of your mind? No matter how many super nice people you come across in the same day, that miserable person is still in your thoughts.
I think that most of us are people-pleasers and we want to make others happy. That is a really good quality to have. It’s good up to a point. We just have to make sure that we don’t please others so much that it hurts us. So you can’t make all the people happy all the time. BIG DEAL! We just can’t let the “Debbie-Downers”, the queens of negativity in the world get us down. We have to stay in our “Happy-Place.” We have to put our personal powers of persuasion into play and do a number on ourselves.
This started out to be a quick post on how great it is to be around nice and happy people. As usual, as I started writing I went off in to my own little world. It’s my blog so I guess I get to do that. As I wrap this rambling post up I would like to challenge you to stay in your “Happy-Place.” Don’t let the “Debbie-Downers” of the world get to you. Be that happy and nice person we all want to be around. I think I say this mantra out loud as well as in my head a thousand times a week, “it’s all good!” The more I say it, the more I believe it. Thanks so much for reading and until next time, be well.
I have said before that I write in my head all the time. As a matter of fact I have been writing this post for the past two weeks in my head. When I was flying to Florida for our vacation I really wanted to write this story and I just lost it and started crying so badly I just couldn’t do it. I am warning you in advance this is a happy/sad story.
On September 13th Dr. Karl Stockhausen passed away at the tender age of 28 from melanoma. I am not sure if I had ever met him and I did not know him. So why did I cry my eyes out on an airplane on the day of his funeral? It is all because of a random act of kindness.
13 years ago when I was remodeling the house that is now the studio, it was a rather trying time for me personally. That project just about killed me (I could write a whole book about the idiot contractors I was working with). No really, I have the physical scars (I had to have back surgery from an injury during the remodeling and moving) and the emotional toll that process took on me was overwhelming. I am such a firm believer that “from all bad things good things come.” The proof of that belief is how beautiful our studio building is and how much the business has grown and excelled since we moved into our current location. But it was not an easy process. It was December of 1996 about 10 days before Christmas, I was exhausted, broke, in pain and working on stripping paint in the new place. I had also worked a full day being a photographer at the old at the Northville Road studio. I was totally fried that evening. During the remodeling I had made an acquaintance with this super nice young guy named Luke (he wanted to rent the apartment from me upstairs when I got it finished) and just he stopped by to see me that evening.
Luke figured out that I was pretty much at the end of my rope and I had not eaten dinner yet. He asked me to come to his house around the corner and have dinner with his family. I remember asking him if it would be OK if he just brought me home for dinner (I had never met his parents or family). I was so puzzled. We never just picked up strangers and brought them home for dinner at my house. But I was hungry and totally out of it anyway. He assured me it would be fine and off we went to his house for dinner.
Luke’s last name is Stockhausen and I was meeting his parents Bill and Carol Jean and several of his siblings for the first time that night. I honestly don’t know how many siblings Luke has or who was there (there were several teenage and younger kids at dinner that night). Karl may have been there, I don’t remember. We ate some kind of warm and wonderful dinner in a bowl (I don’t remember what is was and it does not matter). It’s not just that the Stockhausen’s fed me dinner; it’s that they took in this tired, exhausted and wounded bird and showed me so much kindness. I was a total stranger they did not know and they welcomed me like I was a long lost relative. It was close to Christmas and after dinner they did something else I had never seen. One of the younger children picked up the bible and read from the bible a Christmas passage.
I have no memory of what I ate or what was read, but I totally remember how it made me feel. It made me feel loved (by God and by a family of total strangers) and it made me know that this crazy time in my life would pass and that I could get through it. It was a total random act of kindness that had such a profound effect on me.
This is why the death of someone I did not even know has had such an effect on me. I am so deeply sorry for the entire Stockhausen family. I am just sick that wonderful parents like Bill and Carol Jean have to deal with the death of a child. No parent should ever have to do that. It’s just not the natural order of things. I feel so sorry for his siblings to have lost their brother. I feel horrible for Karl’s fiancée losing her love. I am sure that the loss of Karl will leave a hole in their family that will last forever. I am also sure that the strength and faith of these amazing people will comfort them and bring them through this horrible and difficult time for them.
Back to what I said in the beginning, I firmly believe “from bad things good things come.” When a door shuts a window opens. I have done a good thing because of Karl’s death by telling you this story. It reminds me that my actions and words do have profound effects on others. It also reminds me to be the kind of person whose dinner table is always open to strangers in need. It makes me want to go out of my way to do any random act of kindness for others. I am reminded yet again to put as much good and positive energy as I can out in the world.
I think that you now understand why I have been so profoundly affected by the entire Stockhausen family and why I totally lost it on the airplane. I challenge you to put some good out there and do a few “Random Acts of Kindness” on your journey called life. I ask you to have the kind of family who opens its doors to strangers in need. I hope that you can have a big pot of kindness always cooking on your stove of life. You just never know whose life you may be changing for the better. Until next time, be well.
