Defining Moments

• Published February 25th, 2010 by Angela Carson
• 1 Comment

Life is full of “defining moments”. Some of those moments are good moments and they change our life for the better. Some of the “defining moments” are not so great and our life takes a dramatic left turn and everything we knew has now changed.

I had one of these “defining moments” last week. I was on vacation in Grand Cayman. I had been in Grand Cayman for a week already with a dear friend. Steve was flying down on Saturday and my girlfriend Chris was going home on the same day. No big thing, Chris dropped me off at the house Steve and I were renting on her way to the airport. Steve was flying in that afternoon and he was going to rent a car, pick a few groceries and drive out to the house about 45 minutes away from the airport in the Rum Point area of the island. I spoke with Steve at 7am that morning and he was just finishing getting ready to leave the house for his 10am flight.  

I spent the day doing what I normally do in Grand Cayman, sitting in the sun and reading. I had a pretty much perfect day. I was able to get online and see that Steve’s flight was going to be about 45 minutes late. No big thing he should be at the house around 6pm. I was missing my honey and really looking forward to seeing him. 6pm came and went. 7pm comes and I am starting to get mad. I was thinking that things can run very slow on the island but what was he doing that was taking so long? At 8pm without a word from Steve I went from mad as a hornet to scared to death. WHERE WAS HE? As far as I knew he had been on the island for 4 hours, what could be taking so long? I called his cell phone and I got no answer. I turned on my cell phone and I had no message from Steve.  

I am not one to panic. But I was really starting to lose it. This just did not make any sense to me.   Why had I not heard from Steve? I knew that he had the phone number to the house. My mind was just running like crazy thinking. Was this going to be one of the “defining moments” in my life? Was my life about to take a dramatic left turn and be forever changed? Was my love affair with Grand Cayman going to be over for good? “Where the hell was he?” I know my husband and I knew he was not sitting in a bar drinking a beer watching sports on TV. I could not come up with any explanation about where he could be other than in trouble. I was powerless. I was 45 minutes away from the airport without a car and I knew that if something bad had happened to Steve there was no way anyone would know where I was or how to contact me.  

I am not a big fan of not having control of what is going on or not having a plan. All I could think of doing was calling 911. I had already called the rental car place and they were closed. The operator was so nice she gave me the hospital numbers, the Georgetown police station number and then the immigration phone number. She suggested that I call immigration and see if they could give me any information. Thank God there was someone still at the immigration office as it was after 9pm by then.  The man on the phone was so nice and looked up Steve in the computer and he said that he has just landed at 8pm on an American Airlines flight from Miami. What happened to his comfy direct flight on Delta from Detroit? I did not care at that point. At least I had a partial explanation as to where he was and I figured that he OK at that point and he would have a good story to tell me about his day flying. 

I was finally able to breath and my panic was subsiding. I started to think that maybe my life would go on as it was before. Maybe I had not had one of those “defining moments” that would change everything in my world.   I was on an emotional roller coaster. First I was mad as a hornet, then scared to death and then in the middle trying to calm down and just breathe. About a half an hour later Steve finally arrived at the house by taxi. 

Poor Steve had spent 13 hours at the mercy of the “traveling demons” and he had pretty much been in his own nightmare the whole day. The story goes that he got to the airport in Detroit 2 hours before his flight and it was a total mess at the airport. The lines to check luggage both inside and out were longer than he had ever seen and nothing was moving. After 45 minutes standing outside in the cold (in shorts no less) he finally got up to the kiosk and it said he needed to go inside to see an agent. Wonderful, another long line to wait in as the clock kept ticking on his flight time. Between the changeover to using the Delta Airlines computer system (antiquated at best, I hear from the staff) and the Atlanta airport being closed the day before because of snow the airport was insane at 8am.   Steve even had a first class ticket and that line was not moving. (Note to anyone flying Delta out of Detroit in the next couple of months 2 hours before the flight may not be enough time due to this antiquated computer system with lots of bugs that no one knows how to use yet!) 

Finally when Steve got to the ticket counter it was almost time for his scheduled flight. The gate agent was super nice to him and after getting on the phone with Delta in Atlanta to get help her she booked him on a Delta flight to Miami and then on the American flight to Grand Cayman. Well at least he was going to get to Grand Cayman today he thought. Steve tried several times to call the house phone and the calls would not go through. As he was waiting at the gate for the Miami flight he also texted my cell phone to let me know what was up. As far as he knew I got the text and I knew what was up with him. As you know that was not the case. Once Steve was at the house and we figured out that the real “kick in the pants” for poor Steve was as he was waiting at the gate to get on his flight to Miami his original flight had been delayed and he really had plenty of time to get on that flight. Somehow the gate agent had not actually checked on the status of his original direct flight to see that it was delayed. He really didn’t have to go to Miami and then Grand Cayman after all. He never really missed the plane. He was about to throw-up when we figured that out!

Everybody has a travel nightmare story. If you travel and fly you have these stories. This story is really about traveling and the hassle it can be. Both Steve and I travel a lot and we know the drill.   We kind of look at it as your number has to come up sometime. We just hope when it’s our turn to live the travel nightmare that we are not in a situation when we “must” be there for something important. I remember several years ago one of my relatives was flying all the way from Greece to come to our cousin’s funeral and he was delayed several times and missed the funeral. Getting to your vacation late it not big thing compared to missing a funeral you came half way around the world for. 

You see as this story was unfolding and I kept thinking about this being a “defining moment” in my life and that night I was so relieved that it was not going to be one of those times when life takes a dramatic turn for the worse. What I have since figured out is this actually was a “defining moment” in my life. Waiting for my husband for hours and not having any idea what happened to him did leave a lasting impression on me. It was a lasting impression for the better. I am once again reminded of what matters most. As much as he drives me crazy at times (everybody’s spouse does that from time to time). I do know for sure that I love Steve with all my heart. I am so blessed to have him in my life. How good things really do come to those who wait. I waited 37 years for him to come in my life. He was worth the wait!

I think that Steve and I both learned from this situation how fortunate we both are to be together. Steve kept saying at least he was not trying to get anywhere he “had” to be at. How glad he was not the couple he met with 2 little kids that had been trying to get to Jamaica for 2 days that were stuck in Detroit from NY. I am committed to remember this story with good memories of how happy I was to see him and see that he was just fine. How important he is to me and how lucky I am to have him. How imperative it is to “re-frame” situations and look for the positive in everything that happens in life. I guess that we are all having “defining moments” in all that we experience and do on a daily basis. It is those moments that define who we are a people and what is important to us. Until next time, be well.

Steve and I out to dinner the night after he flew in and us on the beach for the last sunset of our trip