Happy Mother's Day
I couldn’t let Mothers Day pass without babbling on a bit about what it means to me.
As many of you know, in January of this year my Mother Christine suffered a major stroke. My sister Chrysia was driving her (in an ice storm, no less) to a doctors appointment she started getting confused. My sister got her as fast as she could to the closest hospital. I was out of town (no surprise there) I got home as soon as I could for what would become my new normal.
You never know when your life is going to take a dramatic left turn and everything you know is going to change. I guess that is my first point here. I’ll never forget my sister saying to me one of our first phone calls as we were figuring out what was going on with Mom that “she was not ready for this.” You never are ready for huge changes in your life that are not for the better. You are never ready for your parents to age and become ill. You are never ready, no matter what to have a loved one pass away. You are just never ready.
We all go through this awful transition of becoming the next generation at one time or another. It gets scary to realize that you are becoming the parents. Parenting your parents is just about the hardest job of all. We know how this is going to end. OK that is enough of the really sad stuff.
My second thought that I want to leave you with here is that we all must rejoice in the simple things. I am always trying to stay “in the moment” and appreciate all that I have. I am constantly trying to be mindful of all the wonderful experiences I have, large and small. It can be very hard to do at times with all that we have going on in our lives.
Let me get back to my Mom. After 3 months of rehab my Mom is now living full time in Renaissance Gardens at Fox Run in Novi. It is a full time “care” facility. Or the “home” as we call it. (You have got to maintain your sense of humor in situations like this) My Mom is unable to use her right side. No standing or walking and she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life. The good news is her language is improving and her spirits are pretty good.
As I write about how I am always trying to be mindful of the little things. This weekend we are planning a big outing on Sunday for Mom. I want to celebrate Mothers Day like our family celebrates so many holidays, together and at somebody’s house. You see it is those little things like family gatherings that I miss the most in our new situation. Good company, good food (of course, we are Greek!), the kids running around the house and total chaos. That is my idea of a perfect holiday.
So on Sunday we have hired a transportation company to bring my Mom (she does not transfer easily out of her chair) to our house so that we can spend 3 hours together as a family like we used to. We are figuring out how to get her wheel chair in the house and all the other “stuff” that goes along with a handicapped person. It’s just that important to my family and I to have a “normal” family event, just like we used to.
I hope that I am not sounding like a broken record. It is really the simple things that do mean the most. When it is all said and done all we have are the memories and experiences to take with us. It doesn’t matter what I cook, what the weather is or anything else. It’s the being together that is important. The chatter, the bitching, the laughing and all that is a family is what I want and what I miss so badly. That is what I am looking so forward to on Sunday.
I just would like to take the time to wish all the Mothers, Daughters, Grandmothers, Godmothers (my personal favorite title of all), Sisters, Aunts and any other kind of female care giver (that really is what a Mom is) a wonderful weekend. I wish for us all to appreciate the simple things and try to “stay in the moment” of your family and friends. I would also like to give a special hug to those of you who will not be with your Mom or Grandmothers this weekend. I know that it is extra hard for you and please know that I am thinking of you. Not having the people that mean so much to us around anymore is just one more of the reasons I don’t want to grow up. I always tell the kids that growing up is so over-rated! At least that is what I hear. Until next time, be well.
Mom and I Together on Christmas Day at my Sisters House
Comments
Ann Monteith commented on May 15th, 2009
What a nice tribute to Mother's Day and to your mom! Love your new website . . . it's a great showcase for your wonderful photography.
Luis Martinez commented on May 15th, 2009
Awsome group shot of all the young ladys in blue
Kathy Dollyhigh commented on May 15th, 2009
Angela, I loved your blog. It was insightful and comforting to me. I'm glad you are cherishing those times with your Mom. I lost my Mom last Easter, and I sure do miss her.
Marilyn Sholin commented on July 20th, 2009
Angela, this mothers day post is so touching to me. My mom never recovered from a similar stroke and when she was in hospice and my brothers and I and her brother and sister were all there...we were getting loud and telling stories and laughing. All we could think was that this was the best sound a mother could hear, the kids laughing and telling great stories about her. The charge nurse came in and told us to quiet down that this was a serious place of healing. Well, that did it....if hearing your kids laugh isn't healing...what is? Love your blog ...glad you are recovered and had the surgery you needed. Thanks for reminding me about the living in the moment.
Add a Comment